by Happy New Year. I hope you are well. Recently, I opened up my blog and I was surprised to see that my last post was a year and a half ago! Somehow blogging just got put to the side. If I did any writing it was shorter bursts on an Instagram post, but I have to say that I miss paragraphs, I miss writing and I’ve missed all of you. I’m really looking forward to writing more often this year.
I’m sure all of you can attest that the last three years have been a lot (to say the least). Even to describe it in years now, instead of months or days, it just seems unbelievable. Sometimes I would rather just not talk about it or forget it even happened, but it has changed our life so much that I have to acknowledge it, and in fact it is still here and something we will have to navigate for years to come.
In the worst of it I often felt like I was just trying to survive, and maybe you felt like that too. I had a ‘let’s just get through another day’ mentality, and for many days that was all I was capable of. It did make me realize just how strong and resilient I am, and it showed me what was the most important to me – the people in my life and those relationships. Along the way I also realized that I’m just as important to me as well.
The new year often brings such a weight with it. What things can I change about my life? What goals do I have that I can conquer? How can I be better? It’s a lot of pressure to put on yourself. Strangely, this year I don’t have that inner voice trying to figure out how to change me or make me better. Maybe it’s the last couple of years that has changed my perspective on so many things. Maybe with age come wisdom. Maybe it’s all the things that love and loss, and the highs and lows of a year can give you that make you aware of what you really want in life.
“I have a lightness to my thoughts, a gentle kindness towards myself and more of a sense of balance and alignment.”
I am approaching 2023 with a much gentler touch. I don’t need to come in or go out with a bang. I would much prefer to know that I’ve lived the moments. That I’m present and soaking it all in. All those moments, some seemingly insignificant, add up to something big and I don’t want to miss any of them. I want to be grateful for all the moments.
For 2023 I want to be more present. I want to be curious. I want to feel the sun on my face and not take it for granted. I don’t want to miss a message from a friend. I want to be there for the hard times. I want to feel and be heard, I want to listen. I want to learn from moments that don’t go my way. I want to feel and see the beauty of this life. I don’t want to waste time wishing things are different or somehow better. I must acknowledge that everything can’t always be ‘perfect’ and not to keep waiting for this unattainable goal.
I’m accepting that there may be loss, sickness, questions, exhaustion, sadness. anxiety. There will be some things I can control and some I can’t. For me, it is learning to live through all these moments. To feel, even the saddest moments, and to also acknowledge and enjoy the happy moments fully. I would describe myself as an eternal optimist so the worry and anxiety I felt was something new to me. I think it takes time to accept how life can be. It can’t be all the high moments and happy ones. In fact, I think that it’s the hard ones that help us to grow and appreciate things more.
I have an excitement for the new year. I have a lightness to my thoughts, a gentle kindness towards myself and more of a sense of balance and alignment. Personally this year I’m looking forward to focusing on more time for creativity, more writing, more gardening and flowers, more walking, more photography, more coffees with friends, more travel and exploring, more knitting, more reading and learning, more stretching, growing and reaching, more dog snuggles, more music and singing, more conversations and more sunsets. I’m looking forward to a year of beautiful moments.
It feels good to be back.
Here’s to a bright and shining year.
With peace, joy and kindness.
Gentleness and grace.
Love and Light to all.
Nancy
